Topic: Well Being | Posted:January 19, 2012
Frequently things in life are exciting in the beginning and then they lose their excitement over time. Most people are more in love on the first date than they are 15 years into marriage, or more enthusiastic about a job in the first week than three years into that job.
And that’s the reality of this world. Most of our new and positive experiences in life are fascinating and we are grateful for them in the beginning, but then as time goes on, we lose appreciation. We lose our excitement for our gifts; they get old. And most of us accept this reality. We believe that this is the way life is. Things are always more stimulating at the beginning, and then the energy wanes, and you’re lucky if you’re able to have some positive experiences much later into a marriage, work or any experience in life.
Yet the truth is that there is another way. Our blessings are meant to remain as filled with excitement, joy and warmth as on the first day. Everything that we have in life, every gift — marriage, family, work, friends—are meant to be as energizing, as fulfilling on the hundredth day as they were on the very first day. So we have to try to understand, why do our gifts get old?
Before we can answer that question, we have to first understand where our gifts come from. The kabbalists teach a very important basic principle, which is that all of our gifts-- whether physical, emotional or spiritual-- have one source. The joy we feel in the food that we eat, in the beauty that we see, in the love that we experience, every single aspect of that fulfillment, joy, or excitement that we feel, has a source. And it is called the Light of the Creator. It is the Light of the Creator that infuses the energy into all the gifts that we have in life.
If you understand that, you also realize that if you detach these gifts from their source, they will no longer have that energy, that excitement, that newness. For instance, if you’re using a lamp and it’s connected to electricity and the bulb is strong, it can stay lit for hours and hours. But if you detach the lamp from the electrical socket, suddenly everything goes dark.
This is true in the blessings and gifts that we all have in our lives too. If we detach them from their source— and now we understand their source is what we call the Light of the Creator—just as the lamp, they go dark, they get old, they lose their excitement, they lose their fulfillment.
We all know that when you have bread or cake straight out of the oven, it’s nice and warm. We all enjoy eating that bread. It’s much better when it’s warm, straight out of the oven. A day later? Not as good. A week later-- terrible; you can’t even eat it. We know that when something is initially created, there is that warmth, there is that energy in it that we all enjoy much more than we would three days later.
If it is true that the source of all of our blessings, the fulfillment, the joy that we feel in any of our blessings is the Light of the Creator, then we know that when we detach them from their source— just as one unplugs the lamp from the electrical socket — a process of deterioration begins; of less joy, less excitement, less fulfillment. So the question we have to ask ourselves is: What is it that we do that detaches our blessings from the Light of the Creator? If we can learn to stop doing that, if we can learn to keep our blessings connected to their source, then they should stay warm, they should stay exciting, even more exciting on the 10th day, on the hundredth day, than on the first day.
And the answer is simple. When we take ownership of our gifts, when we begin to see and feel that they are ours, we are, with that consciousness, detaching them from their Source, from the Light of the Creator.
In this world, if I want to give somebody a gift, I have it in my hand and I give it to them; it is passed into their hands. It has been completely detached from me, the giver, and received completely by the receiver of that gift. And that is what most of us do, to one degree or another, with all of the gifts that we receive from the Light of the Creator.
When we have a relationship, a job, money, or physical objects and we forget that their source is the Light of the Creator, when we take ownership of them, they have become detached from their Source and they lose their energy. They will get old, and that is why most of us experience less excitement in the 10th year of marriage than on the first date; and why we enjoy a job less in the third year than on the day we first started, because we have-- through our consciousness of ownership-- detached them from their Source, from the Light of the Creator.
So what do we do? Now that we understand that all of our gifts can and are meant to be as warm, as exciting, as fulfilling, always, as they are in the beginning, what do we do? Well, the answer again is simple. To the degree that we can, we need to look at every single gift that we have— be it our spouse, our friend, our children, our money, our physical objects, our spiritual blessings— and consistently remind ourselves that they are not ours; they have a Source and the Source is what we call the Light of the Creator. We have the ability to use these gifts, they come into our hands, but they do not, and we do not, through our consciousness of ownership, detach them from the hand of the Light of the Creator. Only then do they have the ability to remain warm and exciting and endlessly fulfilling forever.